25th November is the International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women, the start of the 16 days of activism. It’s an opportunity to address a small but important detail:
The predominant perpetrator of violence – globally – especially including violence against men, is violent men, and it’s a conversation we should be able to have.
Here’s some ideas worth thinking about:
💡 Look at the problem holistically. Join the dots between who the predominant perpetrator is – violent men – and the mindset behind it: suprem*cy and entitlement
💡 Take time to learn about misogyny and the overt – and covert – ways it shows up in systems and policy, including dress code and the gender pay gap
💡Where it’s safe to do so, challenge harmful and unhealthy narratives that aim to assert power and control, particularly over women. Set organisational, workplace and family values that make it clear what will – and won’t – be accepted in an enlightened society. Teach pacifism alongside the 5Ds of bystander intervention and make it safe(r) for people to step up and step in.
💡Recognise that this is a societal problem – a moral issue – not a psychological one, and how all types of violence intersect. Address direct violence – including through the words we use – as well as institutional and structural harm. Racism, homophobia, ableism, transphobia, Islamophobia and all forms of hate and harm (including war, domestic abuse and human trafficking) are not caused by “mental illness” or “loneliness”, but harmful beliefs about the “right” to dominate rooted in patriarchal structure. Reject ideas that seek to objectify, subjugate, oppress and possess women, alongside narrow ideas of masculinity, that harm everyone – including men.
Otherwise we have to ask, whether or not we really have “come a long way.“
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